Improving emotional intelligence is important for you in many ways. In this article, you will learn how emotional intelligence is important for career success. Additionally, we introduce the MAGICS framework to improve emotional intelligence.
Two of the most important questions asked by managers are:
- What is emotional intelligence?
- How to improve emotional intelligence?
Emotional intelligence is defined as the ability to understand, use and manage our own emotions as well as those of others in a positive way. Individuals who are highly emotionally intelligent are fully aware and mindful of their emotional state. They can also assess the emotional state of those around them accurately. In addition, they are also able to accurately label their emotional state. Hence, improving emotional intelligence is a crucial soft skill for success.
What does Emotional Intelligence comprise of?
Daniel Goleman claimed that emotional intelligence comprises of the following 5 elements:
- Self-awareness: People who are self-aware know their strengths and weaknesses.
- Self-regulation: People who are good self-regulators control and manage their emotions. They are not driven by their emotions.
- Motivation: Individuals with high emotional intelligence have a long-term orientation. They are not swayed by their pleasure-seeking impulses.
- Empathy: They do not judge others. Rather, they have the ability to put themselves in others’ shoes and identify with them.
- Social skills: They are very good at forming and maintaining social relationships. Such individuals are excellent conflict resolvers and can express themselves without much difficulty. They are also good team players.
Why is Emotional Intelligence important for managers and employees?
Research by Stein (2011) suggests that a high degree of emotional intelligence is correlated with success in all spheres of life. It is helpful starting from school to jobs. Human beings are highly social and like to live and work in social groups. Emotional intelligence is crucial for forming and maintaining social relations. Understanding others and being able to accurately respond to their emotional needs makes our social relations and interactions pleasant.
Goleman said, “At best IQ contributes about 20% to the factors that determine life success, which leaves 80% to other forces…No one can yet say exactly how much of the variability from person to person in life’s course it accounts for. But what data exist suggest it can be as powerful, and at times more powerful, than IQ.”
Cotruş et al, 2012
Even LinkedIn has suggested that emotional intelligence is one of the most important soft skills for hiring decisions in 2020.
How can your emotional intelligence help?
An emotionally intelligent employee or manager can contribute to the workplace and his or her own career in the following ways:
- The American Institute of Stress reports that around 28% of work stressors were attributed to people-related issues. Emotional intelligence had been found to reduce occupational stress and physical ailments.
- Emotional intelligence has been associated with better communication and conflict resolution skills. This translates to better personal relationships with supervisors as well as subordinates. Therefore, higher emotional intelligence might lead to better appraisals and all the benefits associated with it.
- Emotional intelligence is a trait of successful leaders. It makes leaders humble, open-minded and empathetic. As a result, they are more likely to get the work done.
- Lastly, low emotional intelligence is often manifested in forms of bullying, harassment, resistance to change and passive aggression. It makes the organizational climate negative. On the other hand, high emotional intelligence makes the organizational climate positive and fosters productivity and innovation.
How to Enhance Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional intelligence is not a definitive trait. One can develop it later in life through experience. In order to improve emotional intelligence, practice the M.A.G.I.C.S approach.
M: Mindfulness
It refers to being aware of all your thoughts and feelings. If you are new to mindfulness, you can practice a small 5-minute activity. Close your eyes and sit straight on your chair and focus on your breath. When your mind wanders, get your attention back to your breath without judging yourself. This way you can be mindful of your emotions and slowly learn to be aware of them. After a few days, you can try being mindful while doing other activities. For instance, when you are having a conversation with someone focus only on the conversation without thinking about anything else at that moment. This will help you when you engage in social interactions. Since your attention will be on the interaction only, you are more likely to assess the emotions and undertones of the other person.
A: Articulate
Individuals with poor emotional intelligence are often not able to express their emotions to others as well as to themselves. Their self-though about their emotions is often incoherent. In order to get better at expressing emotions, you need to articulate your emotions. Start by writing down your emotions in a journal. You can follow the format given below:
| Your emotional state | Your bodily reaction | How often you feel this way | What triggered this emotion | How would you label your emotion |
| fear | dry mouth , sweaty palms | once in while | A dog ran towards me | fear |
Once you get comfortable with self-expression of your emotions, try to articulate your daily thoughts and emotions to your friend or family members. This will give you the much-needed practice to articulate yourself in front of your colleagues.
G: Gratitude
In the hustle-bustle of daily life, we often tend to forget the good things in our life or start taking them for granted. Individuals with high emotional intelligence do not do that. They appreciate the good things and good people in their life. Expressing gratitude by sending a text or a letter or while conversing with your loved one will help you improve emotional intelligence. It might be difficult for you to suddenly thank your mother for the nice meal she prepared or thank the waiter who served your food in the restaurant. You can begin by practicing the gratitude activity which involves nothing but writing down 3 things you are grateful for at the end of each day.
I: Inoculate
Inoculate or introduce some good habits into your daily schedule to get rid of negative thoughts and feelings. Some of the exercises that you can perform to improve your emotional intelligence are as follows:
- Practice delaying your response to allegations when you feel intense negative emotions. Instead of arguing and getting into a conflict, change your response by acknowledging the allegations. Come back to the person later that day and communicate the misunderstanding or apologize for your fault (if it was your mistake).
- Do not judge yourself: You might have a tendency to believe that negative emotions like jealousy, anger are bad. This might lead you to punish yourself when you experience these emotions. Abstain from doing so. Think about what you would say to your friend who was in the same situation. Treat yourself as you would treat your friend.
- Body language while communicating with others: Your body language also conveys a lot of messages during face-to-face conversations. Do not adopt a defensive posture, like placing your arms in front of your body. Maintain eye contact with others. This shows that you are interested in the conversation. Do not sit at the edge of the chair. Try to lean forward towards the person who is speaking. Let the speaker finish before you start speaking. These social etiquettes will help you have pleasant social interactions and develop good social connections, which are key to emotional intelligence.
C: Compassion
It is a feeling that arises when you see someone else suffer and you are motivated to help that person. You can begin practicing compassion by helping an old man cross the road on your way to the bus stand or offering your bus seat to a child or a sick person. In the workplace, you can call your colleague who called in sick and find out if she or he needs something. Doing these small activities will make you empathetic to those in trouble and improve your emotional intelligence score.
S: Specify:
Specify your thoughts, feelings, and objections to what your colleagues are saying. If you do not let them know what bothers you, they will probably not know. Specifying your issues as and when it arises can prevent a lot of conflicts and save conflict resolution time and effort. This, however, does not mean that you will be aggressive in putting forth your points and rigidly push for their implementation. When you disagree with someone try doing the following:
- First, repeat what they said and make sure you understood right. This will let the other person know that you were listening.
- Acknowledge the merits of what the speaker said.
- Then put forth your point by saying “a different perspective to this” or “a different way of doing this”. Never say that the other person is wrong outright. Remember your colleague has spent a lot of time and effort in preparing his or her proposal. Put yourself in their shoes and think about how they would feel if someone outrightly rejected your proposal.
Conclusion
Are you working remotely? Read our second article on emotional intelligence that gives you guidelines to improve emotional intelligence specifically while working remotely or in a virtual team by clicking here.
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